HEAVY PETTING: Episode 5

0:11 - 0:12

Jessica: Hi Heavy Petters!
0:12 - 0:13

Majestic: Hi
0:13 - 0:16

Jessica: We're The Luxery-Legays
0:16 - 0:20

I'm, of course, Jessica and this is my trophy wife, Majestic
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We're going to do a Q&A, so let's get started
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Majestic: Yeah, usually we choose questions and talk about them first, but we were like,
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"Maybe it'd be better and more reflective of our personalities if we just grabbed some questions
0:38 - 0:39

Jessica: Yeah, let's just
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Majestic: had a relaxing beverage and talked about sex
0:42 - 0:45

Jessica: Yeah, we'll include you in this process with us
0:45 - 0:47

So, you're first
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Majestic: Okay, um, "Hi, I love the Joque Harness you posted but I can't blow a whole paycheck on something
0:53 - 0:58

like that" [I feel you] "I had a harness that fit me sort of but the cock itself was too low and the
0:58 - 1:04

back kept falling off my butt. We accidentally left it at his grandma's house anyway. I was wondering
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if you could recommend a cheaper solution to my problem"
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Jessica: Very kinky, I love it. Sex at Nana's
1:11 - 1:13

Majestic: Would love to know what Nana thought about it
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maybe she was excited for you
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One time I tried to make my own strap-on out of an intertube and, I hate crafting so I found it
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really difficult. I am slowly coming around to crafting
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Jessica: Its like our only difference
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Majestic: Yeah, its our only difference. We're basically
1:31 - 1:33

Jessica: The great divide
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Majestic: Right, intertube. You can use intertube to make a strap-on
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You can make it to fit your body, its a really sturdy material, also coincidentally
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intertubes make really good floggers. I think there's an Instructable on that and
1:48 - 1:49

I will post
1:49 - 1:51

Jessica: Yeah we'll post that below
1:51 - 1:52

Majestic: Yeah, WE will post both below
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Jessica: Collectively
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So down with bikes, up with floggers and strap-ons
1:57 - 1:59

Okay
1:59 - 2:01

Majestic: What a guy
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Jessica: Next, "I'm 21 and I've never had an orgasm. I've had 8 partners at several levels of
2:05 - 2:14

commitment. I've tried masturbation, oral sex, toys, on top, from behind, hands down, upside down
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and every which way of every combination. [Clearly]
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Still no orgasm. I get very turned on and everything feels good, then all of a sudden everything stops
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and my response goes away without any resolution. 60 to 0 is the best way to describe it
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Is this physical or mental? Any advice would be appreciated"
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That sound horrible
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Majestic: that sounds really frustrating
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Its really really annoying to really want to do something and not be able to do it
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and I think there's no way for us to tell you if its physical or mental
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there aren't a lot of physical treatments out there for that sort of thing
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A lot of the times it is mental, but it also might just be harder for you to have an orgasm
2:58 - 3:06

Some people can't have orgasms, some people find it more difficult, some people are so
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focused on that, that they can't come
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That's a thing that happens
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Jessica: totally and it sounds like you're just really focused on this end goal
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when you should just be relaxing and enjoying and being in the moment and enjoying that you're
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fucking and having a great time
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You know, slow and steady wins the race
3:27 - 3:33

If you really just give her, going to this orgasm place, like you know, just like enjoy yourself
3:33 - 3:38

Majestic: Because of the way we understand desire, and like mainstream culture, the orgasm
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is the center of sex and that's not, that can't be the focus for a lot of people
3:43 - 3:48

because some people just can't come when they're having sex with partners or maybe it takes hours
3:48 - 3:53

So I would just say keep trying, keep exploring and think about what makes you feel good
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but like take time to enjoy and be mindful about the other really hot parts of sex that feel really good for you
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Jessica: Yeah totally
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Majestic: Okay, "I'm a fat female assigned genderqueer pansexual
4:06 - 4:07

Jessica: Hot
4:07 - 4:12

Majestic: I am sexually attracted to men and often fantasize about having sex with men
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but when having sex with a man I don't enjoy it one bit.
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I've only been men sexually and only a handful at that. Have I just not had enough sex
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or am I maybe not as attracted to men as I think? Is my poor self image the issue?
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I can masturbate and orgasm from thinking about being with a man but when its really happening,
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I'm a dead fish. Advice?"
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Jessica: We do have advice
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Um, I think that like, its an important thing to remember that um, fantasy, like, versus reality,
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those are two very different things and like, that's why its fantasy
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So like, if just because you're like hot for men and you fantasize about it, maybe it doesn't
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necessarily mean that will like resonate with the real sex that you want to have.
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So I would just like, keep that in mind first of all
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If it doesn't feel good, don't do it. That's what I would say first
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Majestic: Yeah and I think, it could be like, something that's really sexy to fantasize about but isn't
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something you want to do in real life
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It could be that you just haven't been with the right partner
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um like, fantasy is a like a perfect way to explore your desires, so
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take yourself out on a date honey, like sit down with yourself and think about the kind
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of sex that you want to be having with these men
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what kind of sex in these fantasies gets you going and is that reflective of the kind of sex you're having
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in reality with them?
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If its not, maybe you need someone you feel more comfortable with
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Your poor self image, like you said, might be the issue, because if you're just focusing on your
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how your body looks and you can't just kind of let go and be in the moment, that might be
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hindering you from experiencing that moment in the way that you should be
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Jessica: One like, good thing to try would be like, exploring sex with people of different genders
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and like seeing, how that feels for you
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and also maybe exploring gender roleplay with those partners is also a thing
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Majestic: Okaaaay!
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Jessica: Right? Let's get kinky, let's get creative!
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What you're doing right now doesn't work so if you're going to continue that way, it will continue to
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not work
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Majestic: Let's take a moment to process
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And scene
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Jessica: Okay um
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"Sometimes I pee when I come. I rub my G [stumbling on words]
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one more time
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"sometimes I pee when I come. I rub my G-Spot hard and well, sometimes I squirt.
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But usually I pee. It makes me feel stupid and embarrassed. Please any advice on how to avoid
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this? Is it normal?"
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Majestic: Well, first of all I would like to apologize for the weird faces I was making during that
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question. I was like, "ooohh yeah do you rub it hard and well??"
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So, going to try and keep those in check
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It is normal. I do think that there are a lot of misconceptions about squirting
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and we are here to clear the air
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Jessica: We reject that
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Majestic: And reject that. We're just going to say different things at the same time
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Um the gland, that the fluid comes out of is called, maybe its a duct, who the fuck cares
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Its called the Skene Duct or Gland
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Jessica: Its the Skene Gland
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Majestic: That's where your ejaculate comes from, into the world and um in those moments,
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sometimes there's a little bit of pee in there, so it can smell like pee
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and it can also feel a lot like you're going to pee but its not really pee
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Jessica: You're not peeing
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Majestic: The other thing about pee, is that its totally sterile until the moment it leaves your urethra
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so people shouldn't shame other people for that, its just normal and there's just a little pee in it
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Jessica: Also like if you want to avoid that, its just a really good practice to pee before and after sex
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Because it could just get rid of that for you, if you already peed, how much pee could you produce
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before and during lovemaking
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But also, if you pee afterwards, you avoid a UTI
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So you wouldn't get a Urinary Tract Infection and you just also phew, wiped that off your list of
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things to worry about
8:34 - 8:36

Majestic: You are in a Win Win Situation
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Squirting is totally normal for some people
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Jessica: Its super hot
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Majestic: Its hot
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Bear down
8:44 - 8:46

On to my next selection
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"I'm 22 and was raised to keep my sexual feelings a secret. I'm straight and its been a year
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since I've last had sex. I absolutely hate masturbating and I hate achieving orgasm
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What advice would you give to anyone facing these issues?"
8:58 - 9:06

Jessica: Well, um I would say that's really unfortunate you were raised to feel shameful about sex
9:06 - 9:13

Starting there, it would probably behoove you to see a counseler
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Because like, that's something you need to unpack and heal from
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Because that could really fuck with the way you fuck right?
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So I would see a counseler. I don't think anything's wrong with you, I just think that its
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good to talk about those with a professional
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While we're very goodlooking, we're not professionals
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Majestic: I really just want to add, because this a little bit more of a serious question
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We, I think that many of us, were raised to keep our sexual feelings a secret
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This could be about our parents, this could be about culture or religion or so many things
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the social climate that we live in
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I think that there's nothing wrong with that
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Like Jessica said counselling can really help if you want to create space to open up and begin
9:57 - 10:01

to talk about that and if sex is something you want and you feel like this is an issue
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for you, that is something you could focus on
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The other thing that this kind of made me think of is, maybe you're asexual
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maybe you're not, maybe that doesn't resonate with you
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but there are tons of asexual people out there and expeiences that asexual people have
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are really varied, but not enjoying masturbation or kind of feeling not into sex
10:23 - 10:30

is totally normal for some people so we'll post some resources below and you can check that out
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whether or not that resonates with you is totally up to you
10:33 - 10:37

So good luck and just continue to think about this and write about it and explore what's there for you
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Jessica: Be gentle with yourself
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Majestic: And be gentle with yourself
10:42 - 10:43

Jessica: Yes
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"So I'm a 19 year old virgin but I'm aching to have sex with a man. I've always told myself
10:49 - 10:54

through all the other nonsense I will do with my life, I just want to wait to have
10:54 - 10:58

sex with a man but now I'm starting to question my old values.
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I am so confused about if I want to throw caution to the wind and have sex with a man
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I don't love for the first time. But I feel like I've come so far that I might regret it if
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I do. Then again, the horniness is OVERCOMING me. Help!"
11:15 - 11:18

Majestic: Well those are some strong words
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Jessica: So you want to have sex with a man
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Majestic: Is what we're hearing
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Masturbation right now definitely is an option
11:28 - 11:32

Jessica: That's sex with a hand or tools
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Majestic: You know, your hand can be a man if you want it to
11:36 - 11:40

Jessica: Anything can be a man if you want it to
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Majestic: Okay so I got to be real with you
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Virginity, as a construct, as a like a word, as a like...
11:51 - 11:53

Jessica: Idea
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Majestic: Idea, is really loaded with a lot of negative things that I find to be negative
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First of all, virginity is like, its something that's more targeted towards heterosexual cis people
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and its very loaded in terms of, you know, a virgin is somebody who's pure and like
12:11 - 12:18

you know, a whore is somebody who's fucked a lot and a whore is somebody who isn't valued in our culture
12:18 - 12:21

Jessica: And enjoys sex
12:21 - 12:25

Majestic: And I think that its really important to acknowledge that virginity excludes
12:25 - 12:31

a lot of desires, a lot of genders and a lot of bodies
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So maybe the terminology that we're going to use is "choosing to have sex for the first time"
12:36 - 12:44

I think that there are a lot of things to consider, but the #1 thing that I would say is maybe your values
12:44 - 12:50

have changed. You're 19 now, its fine for you to make those decisions and it looks
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like you're trying to make sure this decision is an informed one and so
12:55 - 12:59

Jessica: Good on ya
12:59 - 13:00

Majestic: Good on ya
13:00 - 13:07

Jessica: I would think about, what about your values um, like celebrates this waiting idea
13:07 - 13:14

and what it means to have sex for the first time and like, also I would just like write
13:14 - 13:20

while thinking about that, write a list of Pros and Cons and you can just like make sure that
13:20 - 13:23

decision IS an informed one
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Having sex for the first time is like a big deal but also not a big time
13:27 - 13:33

Majestic: There are so many romance myths in our culture about like what that's going to
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look like and Honey, we don't talk about pleasure, or sex or consent in the ways that
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we need to so its not going to be like a Harlequin Romance novel
13:46 - 13:47

More likely than not
13:47 - 13:50

Jessica: It might be though and that's the thing
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It might be like that for you, you'll never know until you try
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But also like, respect what you're feeling and listen to yourself and also set up a support system
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for yourself whether or not you choose to have sex right now or like when this big thing
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happens where you understand that its the right time for you
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Have somebody there so that you're having informed, safe consensual healthy pleasurable sex
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and that you have somebody to talk to before and after about it
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Even if you don't love this partner, if you decide to have sex with somebody that you don't love
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make sure that its with somebody you respect and who respects you
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Majestic: Yeah and I think its totally possible for you to have really really good hot sex
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with somebody that you're not in love with
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Both: Good luck and take care of yourself
14:44 - 14:46

And CUT! Taaaake 4!
14:46 - 14:48

Majestic: NEWSFLASH!
14:48 - 14:51

We just received a question
14:51 - 14:54

Jessica: Hot off the presses!
14:54 - 14:57

Majestic: As we were filming and we want to answer it
14:57 - 15:01

Jessica: Get over here right now
15:01 - 15:03

Majestic: It says, let me just put on my reading glasses
15:03 - 15:06

Okay, " Hello you two"
15:06 - 15:09

I need like...can you read that?
15:09 - 15:12

Jessica: Are we reading this one Honey?
15:12 - 15:14

That's not the one we're reading!
15:14 - 15:16

That's about ageplay
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Majestic: Ageplay is for another episode
15:18 - 15:21

Jessica: Reeeady, Take 5!
15:21 - 15:25

Majestic: "Hi I need your advice. I'm a very unique fat goth"
15:25 - 15:26

Get it
15:26 - 15:29

Jessica: Tall fat Goth
15:29 - 15:30

Majestic: Oh oops, unique, fat, tall Goth
15:30 - 15:32

Jessica: Call me Girl!
15:32 - 15:36

Majestic: Um I love a unique fat tall Goth
15:36 - 15:40

"My problem is that I'm 22 years old and I've never been kissed. No one has ever shown
15:40 - 15:42

interest in me, I've never been able to date
15:42 - 15:46

It doesn't help that when I ask my friends for advice, they say "don't be so scary and intimidating"
15:46 - 15:47

Jessica: RUDE
15:47 - 15:50

Majestic: RUDE, so offended right now
15:50 - 15:54

"I'm not going to change who I am just to seem appealing [Good for you]
15:54 - 15:58

But I always feel so left out when men flock to my friends because they're more beautiful
15:58 - 16:00

than me. What do you think?"
16:00 - 16:02

Jessica: Get a grip!
16:02 - 16:04

First of all, get new friends
16:04 - 16:05

Majestic: Outraged
16:05 - 16:08

Jessica: Also call us, like
16:08 - 16:11

Call Jay Will
16:11 - 16:13

Majestic: Our cinematographer is going like this right now
16:13 - 16:15

Majestic: Part of this about community, finding the right community
16:15 - 16:17

Jessica: You live somewhere that's wrong
16:17 - 16:21

Majestic: Because, there are for sure spaces where people like tall unique fat Goths
16:21 - 16:24

Jessica: They'll gobbleyou up
16:24 - 16:30

Majestic: So this is an Island of Misfit Toys situation
16:30 - 16:35

in some ways. I've felt that way and I've found it really hard to connect with people
16:35 - 16:39

and find people who I think are hot enough to have sex with or whatever
16:39 - 16:41

Both: Taaaake 6!
16:41 - 16:48

Majestic: Okay, we live in a world where, like, basically what I'm trying to tell you
16:48 - 16:50

is that you're not performing your femininity correctly
16:50 - 16:54

Like men are probably scared of you, but that's really badass and really hot
16:54 - 16:56

Jessica: Be scary!
16:56 - 17:04

Because the person who can like handle you as you are, which is a beautiful unique fat tall Goth
17:04 - 17:06

that like
17:06 - 17:14

there are people who will appreciate that and be like, " damn that person's scary and unique and
17:14 - 17:17

they're fat and they're tall and they're Goth
17:17 - 17:18

and I LOVE IT
17:18 - 17:19

Majestic: And I want to fuck it out
17:19 - 17:24

Jessica: And I want to be romantic or fuck
17:24 - 17:25

Majestic: make love
17:25 - 17:30

Jessica: Or do something that you want to do also, 22 year old unique fat tall Goth
17:30 - 17:38

They're going to be like "I want to respect that person. I want that person to be themselves
17:38 - 17:41

and I love them and I'm hot for it"
17:41 - 17:46

So just um, do you and um, find new friends
17:46 - 17:48

because they SUCK probably
17:48 - 17:55

Majestic: Like that's really shitty and I would say find groups of people who are like
17:55 - 17:59

interested in the same things you are because you can create spaces where being tall unique
17:59 - 18:01

fat and Goth are like things that are valued and I think that
18:01 - 18:03

Jessica: Online dating!
18:03 - 18:06

Majestic: Flock to your nearest online dating website
18:06 - 18:09

Like Plentyoffish, Okcupid, whatever
18:09 - 18:12

You guys can call us for the sponsorships later and give us all your money
18:12 - 18:17

Jessica: Or call us for our Babybear's number
18:17 - 18:22

Westcoastdreams, they're single!
18:22 - 18:27

Majestic: Okay, yeah I would say hit up online dating because online dating gives
18:27 - 18:33

you a chance to like, be like, this is who I am, these are the things I'm interested in
18:33 - 18:37

people can like see that and be like, "I'm going to read about this person"
18:37 - 18:39

Jessica: That's how we met
18:39 - 18:41

Majestic: Not on online dating but on Tumblr
18:41 - 18:44

Jessica: On Tumblr! That's online dating for some people
18:44 - 18:46

Majestic: Which is basically my online dating profile
18:46 - 18:49

Jessica: Yeah so Good Luck, keep your chin up
18:49 - 18:52

Westcoastdreams (.tumblr.com)
18:52 - 18:53

Majestic: We love you
18:53 - 18:55

Jessica: Love you
18:55 - 18:56

Majestic: We believe in all of you
18:56 - 18:59

Send us your questions, we want to get inebriated and answer them
18:59 -

Jessica: Yeah love you bye

Title:: HEAVY PETTING: Episode 5
Description:: Q&A

In this rowdy episode we throw caution to the wind, loosen up, get inebriated and talk about DIY sex toys, squirting, orgasms, virginity, unique hot fat queer goths & more!

Here are some resources on asexuality:

asexuality.org (Asexuality Visibility and Education Network)

http://asexualeducation.tumblr.com/

http://asexualityexists.tumblr.com/

Click on the respective items for tutorials on how to make your own D.I.Y. strap ons and floggers (making floggers out of innertube is SO easy and fun!)

Have a question? Ask it at heavypetting.tv/ask

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Video Language:: English

	majesstica edited English subtitles for HEAVY PETTING: Episode 5
	majesstica added a translation

English subtitles

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majesstica

HEAVY PETTING: Episode 5

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