Jessica: Hi Heavy Petters!
Majestic: Hi
Jessica: We're The Luxery-Legays
I'm, of course, Jessica and this is my trophy wife, Majestic
We're going to do a Q&A, so let's get started
Majestic: Yeah, usually we choose questions and talk about them first, but we were like,
"Maybe it'd be better and more reflective of our personalities if we just grabbed some questions
Jessica: Yeah, let's just
Majestic: had a relaxing beverage and talked about sex
Jessica: Yeah, we'll include you in this process with us
So, you're first
Majestic: Okay, um, "Hi, I love the Joque Harness you posted but I can't blow a whole paycheck on something
like that" [I feel you] "I had a harness that fit me sort of but the cock itself was too low and the
back kept falling off my butt. We accidentally left it at his grandma's house anyway. I was wondering
if you could recommend a cheaper solution to my problem"
Jessica: Very kinky, I love it. Sex at Nana's
Majestic: Would love to know what Nana thought about it
maybe she was excited for you
One time I tried to make my own strap-on out of an intertube and, I hate crafting so I found it
really difficult. I am slowly coming around to crafting
Jessica: Its like our only difference
Majestic: Yeah, its our only difference. We're basically
Jessica: The great divide
Majestic: Right, intertube. You can use intertube to make a strap-on
You can make it to fit your body, its a really sturdy material, also coincidentally
intertubes make really good floggers. I think there's an Instructable on that and
I will post
Jessica: Yeah we'll post that below
Majestic: Yeah, WE will post both below
Jessica: Collectively
So down with bikes, up with floggers and strap-ons
Okay
Majestic: What a guy
Jessica: Next, "I'm 21 and I've never had an orgasm. I've had 8 partners at several levels of
commitment. I've tried masturbation, oral sex, toys, on top, from behind, hands down, upside down
and every which way of every combination. [Clearly]
Still no orgasm. I get very turned on and everything feels good, then all of a sudden everything stops
and my response goes away without any resolution. 60 to 0 is the best way to describe it
Is this physical or mental? Any advice would be appreciated"
That sound horrible
Majestic: that sounds really frustrating
Its really really annoying to really want to do something and not be able to do it
and I think there's no way for us to tell you if its physical or mental
there aren't a lot of physical treatments out there for that sort of thing
A lot of the times it is mental, but it also might just be harder for you to have an orgasm
Some people can't have orgasms, some people find it more difficult, some people are so
focused on that, that they can't come
That's a thing that happens
Jessica: totally and it sounds like you're just really focused on this end goal
when you should just be relaxing and enjoying and being in the moment and enjoying that you're
fucking and having a great time
You know, slow and steady wins the race
If you really just give her, going to this orgasm place, like you know, just like enjoy yourself
Majestic: Because of the way we understand desire, and like mainstream culture, the orgasm
is the center of sex and that's not, that can't be the focus for a lot of people
because some people just can't come when they're having sex with partners or maybe it takes hours
So I would just say keep trying, keep exploring and think about what makes you feel good
but like take time to enjoy and be mindful about the other really hot parts of sex that feel really good for you
Jessica: Yeah totally
Majestic: Okay, "I'm a fat female assigned genderqueer pansexual
Jessica: Hot
Majestic: I am sexually attracted to men and often fantasize about having sex with men
but when having sex with a man I don't enjoy it one bit.
I've only been men sexually and only a handful at that. Have I just not had enough sex
or am I maybe not as attracted to men as I think? Is my poor self image the issue?
I can masturbate and orgasm from thinking about being with a man but when its really happening,
I'm a dead fish. Advice?"
Jessica: We do have advice
Um, I think that like, its an important thing to remember that um, fantasy, like, versus reality,
those are two very different things and like, that's why its fantasy
So like, if just because you're like hot for men and you fantasize about it, maybe it doesn't
necessarily mean that will like resonate with the real sex that you want to have.
So I would just like, keep that in mind first of all
If it doesn't feel good, don't do it. That's what I would say first
Majestic: Yeah and I think, it could be like, something that's really sexy to fantasize about but isn't
something you want to do in real life
It could be that you just haven't been with the right partner
um like, fantasy is a like a perfect way to explore your desires, so
take yourself out on a date honey, like sit down with yourself and think about the kind
of sex that you want to be having with these men
what kind of sex in these fantasies gets you going and is that reflective of the kind of sex you're having
in reality with them?
If its not, maybe you need someone you feel more comfortable with
Your poor self image, like you said, might be the issue, because if you're just focusing on your
how your body looks and you can't just kind of let go and be in the moment, that might be
hindering you from experiencing that moment in the way that you should be
Jessica: One like, good thing to try would be like, exploring sex with people of different genders
and like seeing, how that feels for you
and also maybe exploring gender roleplay with those partners is also a thing
Majestic: Okaaaay!
Jessica: Right? Let's get kinky, let's get creative!
What you're doing right now doesn't work so if you're going to continue that way, it will continue to
not work
Majestic: Let's take a moment to process
And scene
Jessica: Okay um
"Sometimes I pee when I come. I rub my G [stumbling on words]
one more time
"sometimes I pee when I come. I rub my G-Spot hard and well, sometimes I squirt.
But usually I pee. It makes me feel stupid and embarrassed. Please any advice on how to avoid
this? Is it normal?"
Majestic: Well, first of all I would like to apologize for the weird faces I was making during that
question. I was like, "ooohh yeah do you rub it hard and well??"
So, going to try and keep those in check
It is normal. I do think that there are a lot of misconceptions about squirting
and we are here to clear the air
Jessica: We reject that
Majestic: And reject that. We're just going to say different things at the same time
Um the gland, that the fluid comes out of is called, maybe its a duct, who the fuck cares
Its called the Skene Duct or Gland
Jessica: Its the Skene Gland
Majestic: That's where your ejaculate comes from, into the world and um in those moments,
sometimes there's a little bit of pee in there, so it can smell like pee
and it can also feel a lot like you're going to pee but its not really pee
Jessica: You're not peeing
Majestic: The other thing about pee, is that its totally sterile until the moment it leaves your urethra
so people shouldn't shame other people for that, its just normal and there's just a little pee in it
Jessica: Also like if you want to avoid that, its just a really good practice to pee before and after sex
Because it could just get rid of that for you, if you already peed, how much pee could you produce
before and during lovemaking
But also, if you pee afterwards, you avoid a UTI
So you wouldn't get a Urinary Tract Infection and you just also phew, wiped that off your list of
things to worry about
Majestic: You are in a Win Win Situation
Squirting is totally normal for some people
Jessica: Its super hot
Majestic: Its hot
Bear down
On to my next selection
"I'm 22 and was raised to keep my sexual feelings a secret. I'm straight and its been a year
since I've last had sex. I absolutely hate masturbating and I hate achieving orgasm
What advice would you give to anyone facing these issues?"
Jessica: Well, um I would say that's really unfortunate you were raised to feel shameful about sex
Starting there, it would probably behoove you to see a counseler
Because like, that's something you need to unpack and heal from
Because that could really fuck with the way you fuck right?
So I would see a counseler. I don't think anything's wrong with you, I just think that its
good to talk about those with a professional
While we're very goodlooking, we're not professionals
Majestic: I really just want to add, because this a little bit more of a serious question
We, I think that many of us, were raised to keep our sexual feelings a secret
This could be about our parents, this could be about culture or religion or so many things
the social climate that we live in
I think that there's nothing wrong with that
Like Jessica said counselling can really help if you want to create space to open up and begin
to talk about that and if sex is something you want and you feel like this is an issue
for you, that is something you could focus on
The other thing that this kind of made me think of is, maybe you're asexual
maybe you're not, maybe that doesn't resonate with you
but there are tons of asexual people out there and expeiences that asexual people have
are really varied, but not enjoying masturbation or kind of feeling not into sex
is totally normal for some people so we'll post some resources below and you can check that out
whether or not that resonates with you is totally up to you
So good luck and just continue to think about this and write about it and explore what's there for you
Jessica: Be gentle with yourself
Majestic: And be gentle with yourself
Jessica: Yes
"So I'm a 19 year old virgin but I'm aching to have sex with a man. I've always told myself
through all the other nonsense I will do with my life, I just want to wait to have
sex with a man but now I'm starting to question my old values.
I am so confused about if I want to throw caution to the wind and have sex with a man
I don't love for the first time. But I feel like I've come so far that I might regret it if
I do. Then again, the horniness is OVERCOMING me. Help!"
Majestic: Well those are some strong words
Jessica: So you want to have sex with a man
Majestic: Is what we're hearing
Masturbation right now definitely is an option
Jessica: That's sex with a hand or tools
Majestic: You know, your hand can be a man if you want it to
Jessica: Anything can be a man if you want it to
Majestic: Okay so I got to be real with you
Virginity, as a construct, as a like a word, as a like...
Jessica: Idea
Majestic: Idea, is really loaded with a lot of negative things that I find to be negative
First of all, virginity is like, its something that's more targeted towards heterosexual cis people
and its very loaded in terms of, you know, a virgin is somebody who's pure and like
you know, a whore is somebody who's fucked a lot and a whore is somebody who isn't valued in our culture
Jessica: And enjoys sex
Majestic: And I think that its really important to acknowledge that virginity excludes
a lot of desires, a lot of genders and a lot of bodies
So maybe the terminology that we're going to use is "choosing to have sex for the first time"
I think that there are a lot of things to consider, but the #1 thing that I would say is maybe your values
have changed. You're 19 now, its fine for you to make those decisions and it looks
like you're trying to make sure this decision is an informed one and so
Jessica: Good on ya
Majestic: Good on ya
Jessica: I would think about, what about your values um, like celebrates this waiting idea
and what it means to have sex for the first time and like, also I would just like write
while thinking about that, write a list of Pros and Cons and you can just like make sure that
decision IS an informed one
Having sex for the first time is like a big deal but also not a big time
Majestic: There are so many romance myths in our culture about like what that's going to
look like and Honey, we don't talk about pleasure, or sex or consent in the ways that
we need to so its not going to be like a Harlequin Romance novel
More likely than not
Jessica: It might be though and that's the thing
It might be like that for you, you'll never know until you try
But also like, respect what you're feeling and listen to yourself and also set up a support system
for yourself whether or not you choose to have sex right now or like when this big thing
happens where you understand that its the right time for you
Have somebody there so that you're having informed, safe consensual healthy pleasurable sex
and that you have somebody to talk to before and after about it
Even if you don't love this partner, if you decide to have sex with somebody that you don't love
make sure that its with somebody you respect and who respects you
Majestic: Yeah and I think its totally possible for you to have really really good hot sex
with somebody that you're not in love with
Both: Good luck and take care of yourself
And CUT! Taaaake 4!
Majestic: NEWSFLASH!
We just received a question
Jessica: Hot off the presses!
Majestic: As we were filming and we want to answer it
Jessica: Get over here right now
Majestic: It says, let me just put on my reading glasses
Okay, " Hello you two"
I need like...can you read that?
Jessica: Are we reading this one Honey?
That's not the one we're reading!
That's about ageplay
Majestic: Ageplay is for another episode
Jessica: Reeeady, Take 5!
Majestic: "Hi I need your advice. I'm a very unique fat goth"
Get it
Jessica: Tall fat Goth
Majestic: Oh oops, unique, fat, tall Goth
Jessica: Call me Girl!
Majestic: Um I love a unique fat tall Goth
"My problem is that I'm 22 years old and I've never been kissed. No one has ever shown
interest in me, I've never been able to date
It doesn't help that when I ask my friends for advice, they say "don't be so scary and intimidating"
Jessica: RUDE
Majestic: RUDE, so offended right now
"I'm not going to change who I am just to seem appealing [Good for you]
But I always feel so left out when men flock to my friends because they're more beautiful
than me. What do you think?"
Jessica: Get a grip!
First of all, get new friends
Majestic: Outraged
Jessica: Also call us, like
Call Jay Will
Majestic: Our cinematographer is going like this right now
Majestic: Part of this about community, finding the right community
Jessica: You live somewhere that's wrong
Majestic: Because, there are for sure spaces where people like tall unique fat Goths
Jessica: They'll gobbleyou up
Majestic: So this is an Island of Misfit Toys situation
in some ways. I've felt that way and I've found it really hard to connect with people
and find people who I think are hot enough to have sex with or whatever
Both: Taaaake 6!
Majestic: Okay, we live in a world where, like, basically what I'm trying to tell you
is that you're not performing your femininity correctly
Like men are probably scared of you, but that's really badass and really hot
Jessica: Be scary!
Because the person who can like handle you as you are, which is a beautiful unique fat tall Goth
that like
there are people who will appreciate that and be like, " damn that person's scary and unique and
they're fat and they're tall and they're Goth
and I LOVE IT
Majestic: And I want to fuck it out
Jessica: And I want to be romantic or fuck
Majestic: make love
Jessica: Or do something that you want to do also, 22 year old unique fat tall Goth
They're going to be like "I want to respect that person. I want that person to be themselves
and I love them and I'm hot for it"
So just um, do you and um, find new friends
because they SUCK probably
Majestic: Like that's really shitty and I would say find groups of people who are like
interested in the same things you are because you can create spaces where being tall unique
fat and Goth are like things that are valued and I think that
Jessica: Online dating!
Majestic: Flock to your nearest online dating website
Like Plentyoffish, Okcupid, whatever
You guys can call us for the sponsorships later and give us all your money
Jessica: Or call us for our Babybear's number
Westcoastdreams, they're single!
Majestic: Okay, yeah I would say hit up online dating because online dating gives
you a chance to like, be like, this is who I am, these are the things I'm interested in
people can like see that and be like, "I'm going to read about this person"
Jessica: That's how we met
Majestic: Not on online dating but on Tumblr
Jessica: On Tumblr! That's online dating for some people
Majestic: Which is basically my online dating profile
Jessica: Yeah so Good Luck, keep your chin up
Westcoastdreams (.tumblr.com)
Majestic: We love you
Jessica: Love you
Majestic: We believe in all of you
Send us your questions, we want to get inebriated and answer them
Jessica: Yeah love you bye