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The Adventurous Adventures of One Direction

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    Hi. My name is Mark.
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    You know, there's a lot of One Direction fan fiction out there,
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    but it seems like all the stuff I've read is written by girls.
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    Which is great, you know, I'm not knocking girls.
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    They're...girls.
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    But, I just thought it was about time there was some 1D fan fic written by a dude.
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    Which... I'm one — dude.
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    So, that's what I did.
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    And then, I animated it.
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    Good morning. Y'all ready to order?
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    I'll have the French Toast, please.
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    I'll have the sausage biscuit, please.
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    I'll have the tacos, please.
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    Harry!
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    What? It's my favorite food!
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    Tacos are not for breakfast!
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    They are now. Introducing Tac-O's.
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    It's meat-, cheese- and lettuce-flavored O's
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    in a tortilla bowl.
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    That's disgusting.
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    It even makes the milk tastes like tacos.
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    That's even disgusting-er.
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    That's not even a word.
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    Hi guys.
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    [ALL] Hello, Zayn.
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    Whoa, new hairdo!
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    Yeah, what'ya think?
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    It's...uh...
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    It's...quite steep.
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    Bit like a...ski jump.
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    Which I guess is what you were going for?
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    *Phone rings*
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    1D! Come in, 1D!
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    Oh look! A call from Psymon.
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    It's an emergency, boys!
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    Report to 1D HQ ASAP.
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    No time for breakfast, lads.
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    The world needs our help!
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    One Direction, thank goodness you're here!
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    What seems to be the trouble, Psymon?
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    It doesn't look good, boys.
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    What doesn't look good? Oh, Zayn's new hairdo?
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    Niall! -laughs What?
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    I will mess you up!
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    Mess me up? Oh, like your hairdresser messed up your hair?
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    Oh, it is ON!
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    Oh! Ow! Ow! Stop it! Oh!
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    It's on like Donkey Kong. -What?
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    Boys! Boys! The world is in its hour of need.
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    We cannot afford to squabble over [ ].
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    Why, what's up, Psymon?
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    Yeah, what's up, besides Zayn's hair?
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    'cause that's really up, isn't it, hehe?
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    It's like woooosh!
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    Ow! Stop! Ow!
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    Reports are coming in all over town.
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    Pussycats are going missing by the thousands!
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    Oh, no! What a catastrophe!
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    Or should I say, CAT-astrophe?
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    Ooh! -No, you shouldn't. -[FALSETTO] Okay.
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    We just need to get out there and help people find their pussycats.
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    It may not be as simple as that.
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    We have reason to believe Lord Faptaguise is behind this.
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    [ALL] Lord Faptaguise?
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    But we defeated him in the Battle of Zindalor.
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    Well, he's back!
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    And we all know how much Lord Faptaguise hates pussycats.
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    So the pussycats didn't just go missing; they've been kidnapped!
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    Or, should I say, CAT-napped?
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    C-cat—catnipped... yeah?
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    Ooh! -No.
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    [FALSETTO] Sorry.
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    So, where is Lord Faptaguise?
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    His dreaded tank fortress, the Wrath-o-Sphere has been spotted
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    on the outskirts of town...
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    Mmm... skirts.
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    ...heading East.
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    Toward the Dimensional Gate.
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    Yes! We must act swiftly!
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    If the Wrath-o-Sphere escapes to another dimension
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    with the pussycats on board, we will never see them again.
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    So, what's the plan?
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    Liam, Niall and Zayn: you three must infiltrate the Wrath-o-Sphere
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    and find your way to the Control Room.
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    It no doubt will be heavily guarded, by guards.
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    Niall and Zayn, you must eliminate them,
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    allowing Liam to gain access to the Control Room.
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    Easy! -Piece of pudding! -What?
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    Liam, once inside the Control Room,
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    you must hack into the Security Terminal,
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    and open the prison cell doors.
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    Hey! I'm on it like Donkey Konit.
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    What? No, wait. What?
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    Just open the cell doors?
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    But who's going to round up all the pussycats
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    and get them out of there?
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    Yes, all the pussies. That's where you come in, Harry.
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    You're telling me.
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    You must go deep into the Marmitian Swamp,
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    and seek the help of an old knight named Paul.
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    He will teach you the ancient art of retrieving pussycats.
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    I don't need help. I can do it alone.
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    No you can't, Harry. That's why you and Louis
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    will seek out Sir Paul together.
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    Only with teamwork, can you save all the pussycats—
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    including your own!
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    Oh no, Molly! Did they get Molly?
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    I thought his name was Dusty?
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    Depends which website you read.
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    Molly? gasp NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO—
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    ooooooooooooooooooooo.
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    Nice!
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    Thanks, but Faptaguise, he stole my pussycat!
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    Now, it's personal.
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    Or, should I say, pussy-nal?
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    Oof! [FALSETTO] My balls!
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    Phew, we made it inside the Wrath-o-Sphere!
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    Now to make our way to the control room.
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    This place is a maze. How are we going to find it?
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    Easy, just follow the pipes along the ceiling.
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    Duh, it's like you've never been inside a Wrath-o-Sphere before!
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    Nerds.
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    Right, the old knight lives in solitude deep within this swamp.
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    He lives alone? So that makes him... a stag-knight!
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    That's your worst one yet.
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    Oof! -Now come along!
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    [FALSETTO] We've been— [NORMAL VOICE] ahem, we've been walking for ages.
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    Are you sure we're going in the right direction?
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    Well, we're following the map!
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    I think we're going the wrong way.
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    What, do you think I can't read maps?
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    That, or you're holding it wrong.
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    What, with my hands? That's how most humans hold things.
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    But I guess you wouldn't know anything about that.
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    What, are you saying I'm not human?
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    I don't know, why don't you ask your four nipples what they think?
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    Maybe those will give you a clue.
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    That's it, I'm going this direction.
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    Harry, come back! We can't go in two directions. We have to go in one direction.
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    Not anymore, I can save the pussycats myself.
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    I don't need some old knight to help me, and I certainly don't need you!
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    Fine. (x12)
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    Fine. You tetra-titted tosser.
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    Whoa, those guards look dangerous.
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    I'm not so sure we can take 'em out.
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    Maybe you and Niall can distract them, you know, like, dress up as hot girls or something.
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    Well, I mean, at least that works in cartoons.
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    What do you think, Niall?
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    Already there.
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    Hey there big boys.
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    Whoa, check it out.
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    Hubba, hubba, hubba!
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    Nice!
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    I love dudes in skirts.
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    Huh! Like I need help getting pussycats out of the Wrath-o-Sphere.
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    Huh! I've been getting pussycats out of the Wrath-o-Sphere since I was a—
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    Whoa, baby.
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    Hey there big boy.
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    Hello.
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    I'm Harry!
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    April O'Kruschev. I'm a news reporter.
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    I am doing a story on the missing pussycats.
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    Oh, I'm- I'm gonna save them.
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    You are? Oh you must be very brave.
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    Mmhm, I'm brave.
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    Well it sounds like we could help each other out.
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    I would love to exchange fluids. Heeheehee!
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    I mean information.
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    Perhaps over dinner?
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    Okay.
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    How about some... tacos?
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    Okay.
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    Okay, this must be it. *knocks door*
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    *door creaks open slowly*
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    Who goes there?
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    It is I, Louis, of One Direction.
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    Greetings.
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    I am Sir Paul, of The Beatles.
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    gasp And Wings!
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    Ehhh... The Beatles.
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    Well, I am in need of your help, Sir Paul.
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    Pussycats all over the land have been captured,
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    and legend has it that you hold the key to retrieving them.
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    Aah, I know what you're looking for.
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    Now that, I haven't used in a long time. A long time.
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    What? What is it?
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    What you seek... is the pussymagnet.
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    Behold!
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    Nice!
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    So... how do you turn it on?
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    One does not simply turn on a pussymagnet.
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    It is activated by a series of tones. You know,
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    like the Key in the He-Man movie.
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    Allow me to demonstrate.
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    singing Well, she was just seventeen
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    You know what I mean. And the—
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    Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
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    Paul:
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    What DO you mean?
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    speaking I don't know, John wrote that bit.
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    singing And the way she looked
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    Was way beyond compare
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    So how could I dance with another? Wooooooo!
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    meow
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    Whoa, that really works!
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    Hitting the high note at the end is the key.
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    Well, I'll try.
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    Though, I bet Harry could hit it...
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    Harry? Is he a friend of yours?
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    Yeah...
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    Or... we used to be.
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    We had a bit of a falling out.
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    Well, you know, you can't pull this off on your own.
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    It's like I've always said: I get by with a little help from my friends.
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    I thought that song was about drugs, though.
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    Shhhh!
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    Don't speak, Harry, don't speak.
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    But I'm crazy about you!
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    I know, Harry... but I must order now—
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    Three tacos, please.
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    Hard or soft shelled?
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    Oh... What do you think, Harry?
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    Hard. A good shell is hard to find, and a hard shell is good to find.
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    Oh, Harry. You always know what to say.
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    Hey, tacos are my favorite food. But you know, I've never been to a Taco Bell before.
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    You mean, this is your first time? -Mmhm.
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    Then... you really must try the Nacho BellGrande.
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    Well, one Nacho BellGrande please.
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    Hey! What do you call a BellGrande that isn't yours?
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    ...Not-chyo BellGrande!
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    Oof!
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    Can we get those tacos to go please? We have a date... at the Wrath-o-Sphere!
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    So... you two from around here?
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    Oh, no, I'm from Ireland. And Zayn is from a wee little town in England called... Dumbhairshire.
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    Niall, I will slap you silly!
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    Bring it!
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    Hey!
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    Uh oh.
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    You're not crossdressers. You're just dressed up like crossdressers.
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    Uh... Zayn? -Yeah, Niall? -RUN!
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    Seize them!
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    Zayn, here! Let's take this elevator!
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    AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHhhhhhh—
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    OOF!
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    The garbage chute! Really wonderful idea!
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    sniff What an incredible smell you've discovered!
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    ...Don't be a c**t.
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    typing
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    This is a Unix system. I know this.
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    I should be able to override the security system to open up the prison doors
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    and let those pussycats loose.
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    Yes!
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    Oh, I'll open that door like Donkey Kong 64. click
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    Louis, Harry: The prison doors are open. It's up to you now to save the pussycats.
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    And make it—NOT SO FAST.
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    You, take pretty boy here down to the Torturitorium for a nice acid bath.
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    I'm sure Lord Faptaguise would enjoy seeing you burn alive to death.
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    Take him away!
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    And you, close the prison doors!
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    Dude, this is a Unix system. I don't know this.
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    Well, if it isn't Liam! -It is. -Of One Direction!
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    ...It is Liam of One Direction.
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    Well, not for long!
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    Oh, for long. And longer! You'll never dip me in a pit of acid, Faptaguise!
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    I have powerful friends!
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    Ha, you mean like this one?
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    Harry!
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    Liam!
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    Well, if it isn't Harry!
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    [Harry and Liam] It is.
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    Well done, May.
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    May? I thought your name was June!
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    April. -Whatever! -Yes, it's true. My name is May.
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    And I am Lord Faptaguise's henchwoman sent to capture you.
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    You liar!
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    No, I really do work for him.
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    No, I don't mean you're lying right now.
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    I just mean, you know... generally.
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    Oh... okay.
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    Okay.
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    Okay, tie him up and hang him from the ceiling as well.
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    He and his friend can burn in the pit of acid together!
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    Oh, but frisk him first. Make sure he doesn't—Well, actually, let me do it!
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    *snickers creepily*
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    Ohhh, Faptaguise. I just now got that.
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    Any weapons on him? -No, just this taco.
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    Dispose of this! -Yes, my lord!
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    But I bought that for him!
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    Shut up, May; no one likes you.
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    Oh... I am now beginning to question my allegiance.
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    I AM a villain, but Harry is so sweet and Faptaguise is a total jerkface.
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    I'm so confused!
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    NOOOOooooo...
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    You hear that? Sounds like Liam and Harry
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    are in trouble!
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    *sliding noise* You hear that?
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    Ooh, yummy! I haven't eaten all day!
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    *guard coughing and sniffling* You hear that?
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    *guard blowing nose*
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    *guard clearing throat*
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    flap
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    BA-THUD
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    squish
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    But I'm not eating that. -Yeah, you hear that.
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    Lower them in! Now you will meet your doom!
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    And once the Wrath-o-Sphere passes through the Dimensional Gate,
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    Earth will never see its precious little pussycats again!
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    *glass breaking* I don't think so!
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    Louis!
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    Harry!
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    Louis!
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    Liam!
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    Louis!
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    Who are you?
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    May.
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    May!
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    Louis!
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    Har—Hey, you already got one!
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    Hmph.
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    sigh Harry!
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    And as for me, I got—a Pussymagnet!
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    [Liam and Harry] Yes!
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    [Faptaguise and Guard] No!
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    Maybe! I am questioning my allegiance; I am so confused!
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    Here goes!
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    ahem
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    singing Well, she was just seventeen
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    You know what I mean
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    And the way she looked was way beyond compare
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    So how could I dance with another?
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    Woo! W-Woo?! speaking I can't hit that high note!
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    Woooo?
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    Seize him!
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    Woo! Wooo-GUHHH!
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    NOOOoooooo!
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    Man, they really need our help up there.
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    But the only way out is up.
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    How do we get up there?
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    Well, there's this old skateboard here.
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    And I could pick up some speed going down this hill of rubbish.
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    If only we had some sort of ramp...
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    ding
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    What?
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    Ready?
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    Yeah.
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    One... two... three!
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    woosh
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    boink
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    plop Whoa! -What the?
  • 15:03 - 15:04
    Harry! Catch!
  • 15:05 - 15:06
    gulp
  • 15:06 - 15:07
    *Popeye-esque music plays*
  • 15:10 - 15:11
    punch AHHHHH!
  • 15:11 - 15:13
    Thanks, Harry! -No sweat.
  • 15:13 - 15:15
    Now, how do you work this Pussymagnet?
  • 15:15 - 15:17
    It's supposed to be activated by a series of tones.
  • 15:17 - 15:19
    Hitting the high note at the end is the key.
  • 15:19 - 15:22
    But if anyone can do it, Harry, you can!
  • 15:22 - 15:23
    Awwww, Louis.
  • 15:23 - 15:24
    I mean it.
  • 15:24 - 15:27
    And I mean it, when I say...
  • 15:27 - 15:32
    singing Can we fall, one more time?
  • 15:32 - 15:37
    Stop the tape and rewind
  • 15:37 - 15:44
    Oh, and if you walk away I know I'll fade -Harry, I think it's working! Keep going!
  • 15:44 - 15:49
    'Cause there is nobody else
  • 15:49 - 15:54
    It's gotta be YOU! You! ahem Y-y-you!
  • 15:54 - 15:56
    Oh no, Harry, you almost had it!
  • 15:56 - 15:58
    I can't hit that high note!
  • 15:58 - 16:01
    Haha! You have failed! The pussycats are mine!
  • 16:02 - 16:04
    Louis! Hit me in the balls!
  • 16:04 - 16:05
    What?
  • 16:05 - 16:06
    Hit me in the balls!
  • 16:06 - 16:07
    No, Harry, I—
  • 16:07 - 16:10
    I can't be a pussy magnet without you!
  • 16:10 - 16:11
    Hit me in the balls!
  • 16:11 - 16:14
    Harry, I only hit you in the balls when you deserve it.
  • 16:14 - 16:17
    You know, like when you make an awful pun or something.
  • 16:17 - 16:22
    Hey! What do you call a Spanish toilet that weighs 2000 pounds?
  • 16:24 - 16:25
    ...El-Ton-John!
  • 16:26 - 16:32
    smack YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!
  • 16:32 - 16:34
    Harry, it's working! -ONLY YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!
  • 16:34 - 16:38
    *confused cat noises*
  • 16:38 - 16:44
    YOUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuuuuuuu...
  • 16:44 - 16:45
    Harry, you did it!
  • 16:45 - 16:47
    We did it!
  • 16:47 - 16:50
    Niall, get Liam down, and let's get out of here!
  • 16:50 - 16:51
    *gun cocks* I don't think so!
  • 16:51 - 16:52
    gasp
  • 16:52 - 16:53
    whirrrrrrrr
  • 16:53 - 16:54
    whap
  • 16:54 - 16:54
    thud
  • 16:55 - 16:55
    April!
  • 16:55 - 16:56
    May.
  • 16:56 - 16:57
    May!
  • 16:57 - 16:58
    You did that for me?
  • 16:58 - 17:00
    Yes, I had to.
  • 17:00 - 17:03
    Once you go Harry, you don't go...
  • 17:03 - 17:07
    Y-you, you don't—you don't go...
  • 17:08 - 17:10
    ...Well, you work on that, bye.
  • 17:10 - 17:10
    Bye.
  • 17:10 - 17:12
    By George, we did it, lads!
  • 17:12 - 17:14
    And Harry, you really hit that high note.
  • 17:14 - 17:15
    Didn't he, Molly?
  • 17:15 - 17:16
    Dusty.
  • 17:16 - 17:19
    And I couldn't have gotten that high without you.
  • 17:19 - 17:21
    If there's one thing I've learned, it's that
  • 17:21 - 17:24
    I get high with a little help from my friends.
  • 17:25 - 17:26
    [Liam and Niall] Awwww...
  • 17:27 - 17:29
    I thought that song was about drugs, though.
  • 17:29 - 17:31
    Shhhhhhh—achoo!
  • 17:31 - 17:32
    Are you coming down with something?
  • 17:32 - 17:35
    sniff Yeah, I think it was that taco.
  • 17:35 - 17:37
    Oh, yeah! Someone's snot rag was all over that taco.
  • 17:37 - 17:38
    Plus, it was on a pile of rubbish.
  • 17:38 - 17:40
    There's no telling what you'll come down with!
  • 17:40 - 17:42
    More like... one infection!
  • 17:42 - 17:43
    [ALL] laughing
  • 17:43 - 17:44
    Ugh... thud
  • 18:09 - 18:10
    Hello?
Title:
The Adventurous Adventures of One Direction
Description:

*Watch in HD, y'all.* The evil Lord Faptaguise is back! And he has a plan so dastardly, only one hero can stop him! Well, five heroes. ONE DIRECTION! Join 1D on their wildest adventure yet, as they save the world from doom and discover the true power of friendshiphood.
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Video Language:
English
Team:
Volunteer
Duration:
18:12

English subtitles

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