[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:07.74,0:00:09.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Hello Heavy Petters! We're the Luxery-Legays
Dialogue: 0,0:00:09.89,0:00:10.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm Jessica
Dialogue: 0,0:00:10.87,0:00:11.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: I'm Majestic
Dialogue: 0,0:00:11.96,0:00:13.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: And we're here to talk to you about self love
Dialogue: 0,0:00:13.91,0:00:18.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because its a very important part of having healthy relationships with others
Dialogue: 0,0:00:18.00,0:00:19.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but most importantly yourself
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.67,0:00:22.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it's also a really great building block for a lot of the things
Dialogue: 0,0:00:22.90,0:00:25.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we'll be talking about here at Heavy Petting
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.15,0:00:30.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: Yeah. Its really important to note that self love is not like a one time thing
Dialogue: 0,0:00:30.03,0:00:37.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,its definitely a process and I think its important to remember that
Dialogue: 0,0:00:37.68,0:00:41.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,loving yourself in a world where your body's constantly devalued and scrutinized
Dialogue: 0,0:00:41.32,0:00:44.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is difficult but its definitely possible
Dialogue: 0,0:00:44.03,0:00:49.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everyone will have hard days. I have hard days. Jessica has hard days
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.63,0:00:53.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it doesn't mean that you have to start over, its just part of the journey
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.52,0:00:58.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Its really important that when you're trying to love yourself, you bring compassion,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:58.93,0:01:04.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,gentleness, kindness and patience to the table when you're thinking about your self love
Dialogue: 0,0:01:04.62,0:01:09.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or self loathing. Try not to mean to yourself
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.05,0:01:12.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Being mean to yourself when you're trying to love yourself in counter active
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.80,0:01:14.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the process
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.27,0:01:16.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Let's get started
Dialogue: 0,0:01:16.35,0:01:17.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: That's a great idea
Dialogue: 0,0:01:17.53,0:01:21.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Step 1: Be Critical of the Kind of Media You Consume
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.07,0:01:24.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ask yourself. What kind of media do I consume?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.17,0:01:31.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is it magazines? Is it blogs? Is it Gossip Girl? Is it the newspaper?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:31.52,0:01:36.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What bodies and lifestyle are being portrayed? Are you reflected there?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.27,0:01:40.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And if so is it empowering or positive?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:40.80,0:01:45.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Mass media is one of the big ways we learn about the world here in the West and often times
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.52,0:01:52.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that media is racist, classist, ableist and doesn't portray a variety of body types and sizes
Dialogue: 0,0:01:52.82,0:01:56.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: Our next point is doing a little bit of Spring Cleaning
Dialogue: 0,0:01:56.15,0:02:02.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Its really important to remember that mainstream media and other types of alternative media
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.65,0:02:05.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are often trying to sell you something and I think its important to think about
Dialogue: 0,0:02:05.84,0:02:10.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,whether or not that's something you want to participate in.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.07,0:02:17.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One way to engage in this without disavowing all media ever and being super militant about it
Dialogue: 0,0:02:17.09,0:02:21.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is to just think critically about the kinds of media you consume
Dialogue: 0,0:02:21.14,0:02:24.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sometimes you do want to cut out certain types of media that make you feel bad
Dialogue: 0,0:02:24.69,0:02:29.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Other times you're like, I love Toddlers and Tiaras, I can't stop watching it
Dialogue: 0,0:02:29.39,0:02:32.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So that's a reality for some people
Dialogue: 0,0:02:32.54,0:02:35.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So that brings us to Step #2
Dialogue: 0,0:02:35.07,0:02:37.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Do Things That Make You Feel Intimate With Your Body
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.54,0:02:43.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Some great ways to do that are: movement at your own pace/terms/abilities
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.39,0:02:47.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this can be swimming, or running if that's your thing
Dialogue: 0,0:02:47.69,0:02:49.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I like to dance
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.67,0:02:51.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: I like to stretch
Dialogue: 0,0:02:51.25,0:02:57.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Also Intuitive Eating, which we'll put the link below (we made a video about that)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:57.11,0:03:00.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sometimes its as simple as putting on lotion
Dialogue: 0,0:03:00.81,0:03:05.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's one of my favorite parts of the day
Dialogue: 0,0:03:05.07,0:03:07.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Besides other things...
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.35,0:03:14.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I do like to be mindful of how my body feels and touching all the different parts of my fat body
Dialogue: 0,0:03:14.64,0:03:19.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don't know, just being quiet and doing that
Dialogue: 0,0:03:19.77,0:03:26.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also another way to touch your body, for those who are more sexual is obviously masturbation
Dialogue: 0,0:03:26.37,0:03:31.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's a really important tool if that's something that you're into
Dialogue: 0,0:03:31.32,0:03:38.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can also look at your body in the mirror and start fully clothed
Dialogue: 0,0:03:38.12,0:03:43.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and work down to being nude. Its important to just be realistic with yourself
Dialogue: 0,0:03:43.09,0:03:46.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is what your body looks like and this is who you are
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.64,0:03:50.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just remembering to spend time with that
Dialogue: 0,0:03:50.20,0:03:53.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: And I think that you know, these kinds of things like looking at your body
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.75,0:03:59.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the mirror, the more tactile feeling your body, feeling what it feels like in a bunch of different ways
Dialogue: 0,0:03:59.29,0:04:05.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is really powerful and does connect you to your body in a way that's really important
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.42,0:04:12.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I found it really...once I got into body politics, I found that part of it to be very intimidating
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.79,0:04:17.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I do really love those things now and I feel that they're really important part of my self
Dialogue: 0,0:04:17.32,0:04:22.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,love journey. Another thing that you can do is write your body a love letter
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.36,0:04:26.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We've both done that. Its a really interesting, really hard process
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.84,0:04:31.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I think that's something you could explore. It can be really healing, it can show you
Dialogue: 0,0:04:31.64,0:04:35.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the places that your relationship with your body might be a little tenuous
Dialogue: 0,0:04:35.91,0:04:37.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Its just really interesting
Dialogue: 0,0:04:37.49,0:04:41.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Be really honest because the letter can be just for you
Dialogue: 0,0:04:41.47,0:04:46.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: Another thing is challenge your internal narratives about your body's worth and beauty
Dialogue: 0,0:04:46.16,0:04:51.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That kind of goes hand in hand with when you're looking at yourself in the mirror
Dialogue: 0,0:04:51.46,0:04:55.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,engaging in these practices of self love, or even when you're just getting ready
Dialogue: 0,0:04:55.74,0:05:00.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Think about what you're saying about yourself and what those internal narratives
Dialogue: 0,0:05:00.66,0:05:01.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,are saying and stop them. Try to counter them with something about how strong or
Dialogue: 0,0:05:01.16,0:05:09.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,beautiful you are if you can.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:09.98,0:05:13.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We definitely have a boundary for when we're getting ready
Dialogue: 0,0:05:13.34,0:05:18.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If one of us is having an eyeliner or eyebrow emergency or another person is having
Dialogue: 0,0:05:18.92,0:05:25.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,excessive gender crisis and is taking up a lot of space and doesn't know what to wear
Dialogue: 0,0:05:25.46,0:05:28.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We kind of just take a step back and try to say a few positive things about ourselves
Dialogue: 0,0:05:28.77,0:05:32.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and that's really awesome. We're not often taught to do that
Dialogue: 0,0:05:32.72,0:05:35.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It can be a pretty radical act I think
Dialogue: 0,0:05:35.87,0:05:38.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Another thing is self care
Dialogue: 0,0:05:38.40,0:05:40.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Take care of your body and your mental health in ways that feel good
Dialogue: 0,0:05:40.65,0:05:42.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Think about what you love to do.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:42.57,0:05:48.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I love to go into my kitchen and mix coconut oil with I don't know other things
Dialogue: 0,0:05:48.45,0:05:51.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and essential oils and rub it on my body
Dialogue: 0,0:05:51.54,0:05:52.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Take baths
Dialogue: 0,0:05:52.44,0:05:58.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: Take baths and have alone time, or watch excessive episodes of Toddlers in Tiaras
Dialogue: 0,0:05:58.72,0:06:01.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as I'm a gay beauty pageant dad
Dialogue: 0,0:06:01.80,0:06:03.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: And I'm a pageant queen
Dialogue: 0,0:06:03.57,0:06:08.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: And yeah, just honor your high glitz lifestyle
Dialogue: 0,0:06:08.44,0:06:14.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Honor your deluxe queen identity in a way that feels really empowering for you
Dialogue: 0,0:06:14.89,0:06:21.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Step #3 is a hard one: Think About How the People In Your Life Make You Feel About
Dialogue: 0,0:06:21.69,0:06:23.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yourself and Your Body
Dialogue: 0,0:06:23.95,0:06:32.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's hard and complicated. Because for a lot of people
Dialogue: 0,0:06:32.02,0:06:34.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the people that make you feel really bad about your body/yourselves are your family
Dialogue: 0,0:06:34.41,0:06:39.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,members and that's hard. Its just important to set clear boundaries
Dialogue: 0,0:06:39.73,0:06:45.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Have adult loving conversations with the people in your life about what they can
Dialogue: 0,0:06:45.10,0:06:47.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and cannot say about you and your body
Dialogue: 0,0:06:47.96,0:06:53.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And stick to those and make sure that when that starts to happen
Dialogue: 0,0:06:53.06,0:06:57.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you give them a chance to immediately stop and then you remove yourself
Dialogue: 0,0:06:57.28,0:07:00.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: So another really important thing is saying nice things about other people instead
Dialogue: 0,0:07:00.41,0:07:05.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of bad things. Like being positive about others helps you be more positive about yourself
Dialogue: 0,0:07:05.87,0:07:10.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also when people are saying really negative things about other people, that's usually
Dialogue: 0,0:07:10.85,0:07:14.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about their own self hatred stuff than the other person
Dialogue: 0,0:07:14.88,0:07:22.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When Jessica and I go in public, people always stare at us, yell at us, try to take pictures of us
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.32,0:07:27.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sometimes its nice, sometimes its mean, sometimes I'm not really sure what's happening
Dialogue: 0,0:07:27.70,0:07:31.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But like one that I've been able to navigate the intense hypervisibility that
Dialogue: 0,0:07:31.76,0:07:39.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,comes with us as pair in pubic is, I also look at other people and talk about other people
Dialogue: 0,0:07:39.53,0:07:47.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I frame the things that I say with compassion, compliment people, say nice things about them
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.77,0:07:49.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think that's really important also
Dialogue: 0,0:07:49.65,0:07:55.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: So also, once you've gotten past these initial stages and you feel more comfortable with this
Dialogue: 0,0:07:55.88,0:08:03.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you can challenge people when they're body policing or racist or classist or any of these things
Dialogue: 0,0:08:03.57,0:08:08.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and start engaging people and challenging them to start thinking about what they're saying
Dialogue: 0,0:08:08.03,0:08:13.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and how what they're saying affects you and the world around them
Dialogue: 0,0:08:13.22,0:08:20.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: The other thing is Get Creative About the Way You Present Your Body to the World
Dialogue: 0,0:08:20.45,0:08:22.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is going to be really different for everybody.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:22.60,0:08:26.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Obviously it manifests in very specific ways for us, but it can be something as simple as
Dialogue: 0,0:08:26.75,0:08:29.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,wearing a fancy sweater or just trying something new
Dialogue: 0,0:08:29.92,0:08:31.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe you want to wear falsies during the day
Dialogue: 0,0:08:31.94,0:08:33.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Or stripes
Dialogue: 0,0:08:33.02,0:08:35.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: Get creative and take risks
Dialogue: 0,0:08:35.54,0:08:40.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It can be a really fun way to be engaging in self love
Dialogue: 0,0:08:40.57,0:08:44.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Its important to remember when you start doing that or really any of this
Dialogue: 0,0:08:44.95,0:08:48.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to celebrate the small victories. And the big victories
Dialogue: 0,0:08:48.19,0:08:55.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Celebrating the small things like how you ate something you wanted to eat or you
Dialogue: 0,0:08:55.32,0:08:59.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,didn't wear a sweatshirt to cover your arms
Dialogue: 0,0:08:59.19,0:09:05.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just different things to honor that you're taking these steps and that you started this journey
Dialogue: 0,0:09:05.62,0:09:11.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is really really important because it will encourage you to continue and those small
Dialogue: 0,0:09:11.62,0:09:17.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,victories to you, if you're modelling yourself after someone who's been on this journey for a long time
Dialogue: 0,0:09:17.81,0:09:25.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is a huge victory for you and was a huge victory for people like you and me
Dialogue: 0,0:09:25.64,0:09:28.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I remember the first time I wore a pair of pants that fit me
Dialogue: 0,0:09:28.97,0:09:32.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I remember when I stopped wearing pants because I hate them
Dialogue: 0,0:09:32.36,0:09:37.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: I remember when I stopped wearing hoodies in the summer even though I was super hot
Dialogue: 0,0:09:37.01,0:09:38.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I was ashamed of my body
Dialogue: 0,0:09:38.82,0:09:41.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: That's right, we took that one from real life
Dialogue: 0,0:09:41.14,0:09:45.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So these things are important. Just be kind to yourself
Dialogue: 0,0:09:45.21,0:09:50.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Remember to talk to yourself as you would someone you love dearly
Dialogue: 0,0:09:50.86,0:09:55.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Like you would never tell your Nana the mean things you tell yourself
Dialogue: 0,0:09:55.18,0:09:58.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: Or even, treat your body like its a lover
Dialogue: 0,0:09:58.91,0:10:01.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Whatever that means to you
Dialogue: 0,0:10:01.14,0:10:06.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Knowing you, maybe you have some homework you'd like to give to the viewers
Dialogue: 0,0:10:06.26,0:10:13.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: I think homework is really important and for those of you who are willing
Dialogue: 0,0:10:13.08,0:10:17.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,These are some things I would encourage you to go try
Dialogue: 0,0:10:17.76,0:10:19.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,HOMEWORK
Dialogue: 0,0:10:19.16,0:10:21.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Write a Love Letter to Your Body
Dialogue: 0,0:10:21.69,0:10:26.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just sit down for like 5 minutes. It can be a really interesting process
Dialogue: 0,0:10:26.13,0:10:28.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Another thing is, like we said
Dialogue: 0,0:10:28.01,0:10:29.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Look at Your Body in The Mirror
Dialogue: 0,0:10:29.81,0:10:32.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Touch Your Body in Ways That Feel Good
Dialogue: 0,0:10:32.62,0:10:35.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Take Risks
Dialogue: 0,0:10:35.76,0:10:40.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Another really important thing that my friend Blaise told me that she was doing with her partner
Dialogue: 0,0:10:40.86,0:10:47.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is that every day we share 3 things that we appreciate about each other
Dialogue: 0,0:10:47.41,0:10:51.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the way that we've modified that to kind of give room for our self love
Dialogue: 0,0:10:51.10,0:10:55.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,has been we also share 3 things that we are grateful for about ourselves
Dialogue: 0,0:10:55.94,0:10:57.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Get creative
Dialogue: 0,0:10:57.28,0:11:03.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Think about the ways that you're sexy but also a really good family member or friend
Dialogue: 0,0:11:03.51,0:11:07.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or how you're really funny or intelligent
Dialogue: 0,0:11:07.10,0:11:10.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think that putting that really intentional time into loving yourself every day is
Dialogue: 0,0:11:10.83,0:11:15.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,really powerful and will change your relationship with your body
Dialogue: 0,0:11:15.24,0:11:17.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: So. We love you
Dialogue: 0,0:11:17.50,0:11:19.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: We love you and good luck
Dialogue: 0,0:11:19.11,0:11:23.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let us know how this goes and if you have any questions, let us know
Dialogue: 0,0:11:23.21,0:11:27.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You can hit us up at HeavyPettingTalkTv.tumblr.com
Dialogue: 0,0:11:27.40,0:11:34.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: or Majesstica69@gmail.com
Dialogue: 0,0:11:34.16,0:11:35.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Majestic: Okay loving you
Dialogue: 0,0:11:35.96,9:59:59.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Jessica: Byyye