0:00:01.138,0:00:02.717
There was a woman

0:00:02.717,0:00:04.071
that I was dating

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and um, she told me,

0:00:09.042,0:00:11.345
--and this was the first time I ever questioned my disability

0:00:11.345,0:00:14.481
and the impact it had on my social life--

0:00:14.481,0:00:20.921
she said "Helen, I um, can't be with you 100%.

0:00:20.921,0:00:23.223
I do love you, I do care for you,

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but I can't be with you 100%"

0:00:26.560,0:00:28.909
And I said "why?"

0:00:28.909,0:00:30.063
She would never say it.

0:00:30.063,0:00:32.199
I said "because of my disability?"

0:00:32.199,0:00:34.383
She said "yes".

0:00:35.168,0:00:37.640
So I felt like, felt at that point,

0:00:37.640,0:00:39.373
that if she was honest enough to tell me that,

0:00:39.373,0:00:41.642
then most people are thinking that,

0:00:41.642,0:00:44.311
that I'm only gonna give her but so much

0:00:44.311,0:00:47.383
<u>_</u>as she's going to be able to give me.

0:00:48.445,0:00:52.852
Um, so, it's real difficult.

0:00:53.708,0:00:55.255
It's real difficult.

0:00:55.255,0:00:58.125
I mean, yeah I meet women,

0:00:58.125,0:01:00.395
I love women, I love beautiful women,

0:01:00.395,0:01:05.411
but when I started to see that it's not, this is not for me,

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I'm just going to y'know let you go

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and that's just about mine,

0:01:09.736,0:01:12.205
I have no problems with that,

0:01:12.205,0:01:18.481
but I think that the black, black women, or black lesbians, or whatever you wanna call us,

0:01:18.481,0:01:27.632
we are fearful of the unknown.

0:01:27.632,0:01:31.291
To look at me, you don't know what this is.

0:01:31.291,0:01:32.826
So you're afraid of it,

0:01:32.826,0:01:35.929
cause you're not familiar with it.

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So it makes you more, um,

0:01:40.867,0:01:43.370
you know, when we are afraid of things,

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we try to stay away from them,

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instead of trying to, to get the knowledge of what that is,

0:01:49.643,0:01:51.244
or what that person is,

0:01:51.244,0:01:52.679
or what that disability is,

0:01:52.679,0:01:56.249
or why that person is the way they are.

0:01:56.249,0:02:01.622
So we have a tendency to run away from things that are unfamiliar and that we're afraid of.